How you doin’? Hopefully you’re well, but maybe as the warm weather approaches and layers of clothes are peeling off you might find yourself in need of a little confidence boost. If so you came to the right place as I have compiled a list of seven (you got that right seven!) somewhat strange things that will help boost your confidence in no time. So let’s get to it shall we?
1. Party of 1
I’ve heard a million times how great it is to get out there be around people have fun and blah blah blah, but what no one ever tells you is alone time is equally if not more beneficial. This is because when we are around others there are often so many messages being passed along to us we cant help but be affected and every now and then getting away from that can help bring you back.
Everyone knows people can wreak havoc on the old confidence by making mean comments but we can also be affected greatly by the comments those around us make about others as well as by the non verbal cues most of us might not even realize are there. And one of the worst ways our confidence can be affected is when we find ourselves in situations like this…
See when we spend so much time surrounded by other people we are often exposed to their neurotic shit and even though it shouldn’t affect us, even though you might be cool with yourself, once you are caught in a situation with people criticising themselves you begin to look for your own faults.
Trust me I know this! I had two friends in college and every time I went to lunch or dinner with them they spent the entire time calling themselves fat. The first few times I sat silently looking at the wall (hey where I’m from you don’t sit insulting yourself with your friends), but after a while I felt like I had to say something. And that’s how it starts, contributing for the sake of solidarity, then next thing you know you start questioning yourself and after a while you start believing everything you are saying. Cut to you two months later complaining you can’t wear that cute pair of shorts because you are way too fat.
Yep they got you and now you are one of them (maniacal laugh). So I propose the best action to reverse this is to step away from everyone, even if it doesn’t seem like the people around you are a bad influence. Just taking the time away allows you to check in and see how you feel about things. It allows you to figure out who you are and what you want without the noise of someone else’s opinion.
I’m not saying cut off humanity for good just have a trial separation with it.
Ok I know this one sounds weird but just give me a second to explain. Taking selfies may seem like an incredibly narcissistic stupid thing to do, but taking all of that time to snap pics of yourself is also very beneficial. Think about it, you’re sitting down for a period of time studying yourself which you may think will lead to being hypercritical of yourself… it won’t.
Selfies are you taking pics of yourself and because of that you’ll learn to find the great things. Sure it might take 100 pictures to get 3 great ones, but in the process you will find things about yourself that you absolutely love and want to highlight. You also learn tricks to look better in pics so when someone else is behind the camera you won’t shudder nearly as much. And the absolute best part is at the end of it you will have a bunch of awesome pics of yourself looking fantastic.
You even learn to love the mundane, non-perfect ones like my fav pic of the moment ^.
3. Be a little bit mean girl.
I have to be careful with this advice because I am sure someone will misinterpret it, so pardon me if I explain a little too much.
You know how people always tell you that bullies and mean girls only ever attack other people to make themselves feel better? Well this kind of…. very slightly takes from that theory. The gigantic difference being we know that tearing others down does not make us feel better it just makes us assholes. What we will do is simply use others as inspiration to gain some confidence in ourselves, but if I’m being honest a tiny part of this is a little judgey (it can’t be avoided). I also suggest doing this with people you don’t actually know, use strangers, internet personalities, and celebrities where applicable.
So what are we doing?
Well start with an issue you are having like the shorts example from above. Summer is around the corner and you would love nothing more than to rock some short shorts but you think you’re too big and your thighs are bad blah blah blah. Find someone who also fits into your incapable of wearing shorts category that proudly rocks shorts all summer long. Take note of their confidence and really study them the positives and negatives. Then think about yourself in comparison to them, which I admit generally comparisons are not great but when we are mindfully doing it they can be quite positive. Don’t think of it in terms of they shouldn’t and neither should I but rather if they can why can’t I. And do that for a while with different people and soon their attitude will start to rub off.
Also avoid the comments section, this is not about outside comments this is about you and how you feel and NEVER BE A TROLL. Talking crap about that person is not going to get you in those shorts any faster, as a matter of fact it will keep you out of them.
Oh and one more thing, this only works when you find good examples so avoid this…
Unless that is the look you are going for and that you find positives in, then have at it.
4. Get Naked!
This one is pretty darn simple….
Strip down and show yourself what you’re working with cause trust me it is no way near as bad as you think it is. Clothes have a way of exaggerating things especially ill-fitting ones (as seen in the pic above), so by stripping down you get to see yourself with no distortions. It’s like taking off your make-up to get an idea of what your bare face looks like. You’re just getting rid of all the bells and whistles.
And if you just can’t do naked take as much off as you are comfortable with. Oh and for goodness sake please don’t take any damn pictures! Naked pics always have a way of turning into a bad idea… they can get lost or stolen people.
5. Social Media Superstar
Social media is a harsh mistress, on one hand it can be incredibly positive and on the other it calls all of the trolls out from under their bridges. And don’t even get me started on the whole like situation!
I can’t even begin to explain why social media can increase confidence, but it can. Just putting things out there for everyone to see makes you feel better (lets face it, doing this requires balls people) and even if no one ever clicks on it or likes it you feel like you’ve done something. Because you have! You believed in yourself enough to put yourself out there and even though there are mean folks lurking you didn’t care. It’s incredibly liberating experience that opens the door to you taking more risks.
The last two are pretty common and mundane and this sucker is getting long so pardon the lack of explanation.
6. Buy stuff
Something new is always a major confidence boost, but remember don’t over do it. Finding that new item that makes you look and feel better can change your whole outlook, going into debt on the other hand will leave you feeling like crap… see the distinction?
Fun fact: the pic links to an article about retail therapy.
7. Pamper, pamper, pamper!
Cause when has pampering yourself ever felt bad?
And that’s all folks! Hope you liked it and found some confidence boosters.