I realized about two months into my psyc program that I am ABSOLUTELY nothing like most of my classmates. Every single friend I have had since like forever has been in some way completely inappropriate. They are loud and they make non politically correct jokes and I LOVE IT. I never realized how much I would miss being free to speak truthfully and without restraint until I started grad school. Almost everyone (I say almost because some of my classmates are AWESOME) around me is trying so hard to say the right thing and be professional; it is so frustrating. I can’t joke about being the black kid without getting the look like “don’t say that, it’s mean” and I hate it. Seriously when I am the craziest one in a group that is a pretty fucking pathetic boring group of people.
And by the way what is this professionalism shit and why do they keep telling us we have to be it 24/7. Remember the days when you went to work and did your job then went home and lived your life. What happened to those days? Now I am suppossed to act like I have a stick up my ass every minute of everyday for the rest of my life just in case a client is lurking around the corner. I’m sorry but that is not going to happen! I am a good kid. I don’t act crazy and wouldn’t touch a drug in a million years. I understand what my career is and I will do everything I can to help my future patients, but that is where it ends. I refuse to be in therapist mode all day everyday because to be honest besides the people that pay to sit with me for 50 mins I really don’t care about other people’s problems and I really don’t want to hear them. Sorry but its true and I wish strangers would stop thinking otherwise. If I have to force kindness and pretend to listen one more time I am going to scream!
Maybe that is why I take the proud stance of being the anti-psyc. because I refuse to give up my life for someone else. I won’t censor my facebook, myspace, or this blog and I refuse to think twice about any decision that I make. I like the career that I have chosen, but it does not in any way define me. There are so many other things in my life I want to and will do, which to be honest I probably love way more than psychology. I come from a family that leaves work at WORK! Life is far to short to spend it checking in to make sure you are acting like a professional. I’m sorry if anyone won’t take me seriously because I am acting like myself then they don’t want me anyway. So whatever to them.
Thank GOD for my family and old friends because without them I would be so miserable.